The Stupidest Thing I've Heard This Week

I ought to start keeping track of all the stupid things I hear on the news and on the Internet, I really should. Either that, or just start a "Stupidest Thing I've Heard This Week" contest or something like that.

This week has really been a boon for hearing stupid things on the Internet and on the news, and to tell you the truth it was kinda hard to decide which one to write about first. But I made the decision and will be writing about each of them in turn, although only one can be declared the "Stupidest Thing I've Heard This Week" - which I will present to you now.

Ready? All righty, then, here it is, "The Stupidest Thing I've Heard This Week:"

The shootings at Sandy Hook Elementary were staged.

Yeah, I know, I thought so too. Stupid as hell, right? But the sad thing is that there are people out there on both sides of the gun control debate who believe this, and for entirely different reasons. Then there's the third group of people, those who are prone to wearing tinfoil hats, who believe it for an entirely different reason. So let's take a look at all three of them, shall we?

The liberals believe it because they think the conservatives staged the shootings to prove the need for less gun control and more guns, specifically the arming of teachers. The conservatives believe it because they think the liberals staged it to prove the need for more gun control and less guns. The tinfoil hat crowd believes it because they think the government staged it to give the government a reason to abolish the Second Amendment, thereby disarming the public and then being able to use those bazillion 9mm rounds the Department of Homeland Security bought to go on an all-out attack on the American people.

And all three of these groups are as full of crap as a Christmas turkey, the only difference being just how full of crap each group is. So in my humble opinion, here's the order of being full of crap that I've placed these groups in from least full of crap to most full of crap.

The conservatives are the least full of crap of the three, but only slightly less than the liberals. The conservatives are the least full of crap because one of the main points that the conservatives support is the preservation of life by their stance against abortion, and no conservative in his right mind would even consider staging something as horrendous and nefarious as the shooting of dozens of innocent children. The conservatives believe they have a more sacred belief in the preservation of life than the liberals, so it's easy for the conservatives to believe that the liberals would stage this. After all, the liberals support the killing of children through abortion, don't they?

The liberals are more full of crap than the conservatives, but as I said previously, not by much. The reason for this is that the liberals are much more vehement, angry, and insulting than the conservatives when it comes to voicing opinions and taking action against those who dare to have opinions and beliefs that are different than their own (see my blog of last week, "What The Liberals Have Taught Me"). There are those among the liberal crowd who absolutely believe that the conservatives would do something like this because they believe the conservatives are so entrenched in their "more guns, less crime" mentality that they'd do anything to promote that ideal. After all, the conservatives support 'legal murder' by supporting the death penalty, don't they? The liberals are wrong, of course, but you can't tell them that.

But without a doubt, the group that is the most full of crap is the "tinfoil hat" crowd, also known as The Conspiracy Theorists, or "TCTs" for short. The TCTs are so caught up in the whole 'conspiracy theory' thing that they're willing to believe anything bad about our government, no matter what it is or no matter how dubious the source is. As I mentioned before, the purchasing of all that 9mm ammunition by the DHS is good proof of this. To the TCTs this is a sure sign that the government is gearing up to stage an all-out attack on the American people, shooting down citizens in the streets. And of course, before that happens the public would have to be disarmed, and that means the Second Amendment would have to be repealed. And what better way to do that than to enrage the public with an unspeakable act of violence, such as the shooting and killing of not one or two but dozens of innocent children? (These are the same people who believe the government actually carried out the 9/11 attack, by the way.)

And the really sad thing - to me, anyway - is that the majority of TCTs are conservatives. There's a few liberals thrown in, but not many. The vast majority of people who believe crap like this are conservatives - uber conservatives, to be more precise, conservatives who have taken their belief in conservative values and their belief in God to the very extreme until their level of lunacy is right up there with Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist Church crowd. These people are radical to the extremes in their beliefs, and I'm not sure who poses more of a risk to our nation, them or the liberals with similar beliefs.

And there you have it, this week's winner of "The Stupidest Thing I've Heard This Week."

Any way you look at it, anyone who actually believes that the shootings at Sandy Hook were staged is a moron at best. Simple logic tells you that there's no way in hell that any group could plan and execute something like this and still keep it a secret. The sheer number of people who would have to be involved is enough to let anyone with an ounce of common sense know that it's just not possible. As the old Hell's Angels saying goes, "Three can keep a secret if two are dead," and this is no exception.

Personally, all three of the groups disgust the living hell out of me.

IHC

How to Waste the Government's Time

I'll be the very first to admit that the challenges our government faces now are the greatest and most difficult challenges our nation has ever had to face. True, our government has created a lot of the challenges themselves, but that's another point for another time. But as I was saying, the challenges our government faces are serious and, quite possibly, world-changing. There's the unrest in the Middle East between Syria and Israel, with Iran sticking their noses in it; there's the drawdown in Afghanistan and the concerns on how that one will turn out (one name for you: Viet Nam); there's the saber-rattling by the fat little moron in North Korea, who I think is taking a lesson from "The Mouse That Roared." (Don't know what I'm talking about? Read the book or see the movie.)

On the home front there's the ever-rising unemployment rate, spurred on now by the layoffs and cutbacks being forced on companies by NObamacare; there's the all-out assault on the Second Amendment by the Buffoon In Chief and his band of merry idiots, and then there's the polarization of our people along political lines in what has been the nastiest political era in our nation's history.

Yes, our government certainly has a lot on its plate, so the last thing they need is a useless petition to take up their time. Personally, I think they have much more important things to do.

But you can't tell that to the people at New England Sasquatch Research and Protection. No, sir, you sure can't tell them that - all 660 of them. Seems that those folks, spearheaded by someone who calls herself "Rachael Zhang," have started a petition at the White House's petition website with the goal of the petition - and this is a direct quote from the petition - being to "officially recognize the Sasquatch as an indigenous species and have them lawfully protected by laws banning any hunting."

No, I'm not kidding. These people actually want Congress to pass a law recognizing and protecting a species of creature that no one has been able to prove actually exists.

Yeah, it's kinda like passing a law to protect the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny.

Now, for those of you who haven't been following my blog, about two years ago I posted something about Animal Planet's "Finding Bigfoot," and to be honest it was somewhat less than flattering on the show's part. My issue there is not with the topic of Bigfoot, but rather with the idiots and clowns on the show. As for the issue of whether or not a Bigfoot-type creature actually exists, I think it's possible. Not likely, but it's possible. And I'm the kinda guy that in order to get me to believe this, you're gonna have to show me rock-solid PROOF, actual irrefutable evidence to make a believer out of me. So far, no one's managed to do this.

Personally, I think the petition and the idea of a law protecting a mythical creature is ludicrous at best, moronic at worst, and I said so on the group's Facebook page. The conversation which followed was interesting to say the least, and if you have a Facebook page then I suggest you go check it out.

My main point in the conversation was to try and convince "Rachael" that the burden of proof was on HER, that SHE and her organization were the ones who had to actually PROVE that this creature exists in order for the Congress to take them seriously. She tried dazzling me with a bunch of scientific terms, jargon, and phrases, but I guess she's not as smart as she thinks she is - or I'm smarter than she thought I was - because that effort fell flat on its ass. Then she went on the defensive, simply stating that it wasn't her responsibility to prove anything to anyone, especially me. My counterpoint is that if she can't convince me, then what chance does she and her group stand with Congress and the President?

Try as I might, that last point of simple logic just seems to escape her. Then again, logic always "escapes" someone when they know they've been proven wrong.

I even pointed out to "Rachael" that she had the perfect opportunity to convince someone who admitted that it was possible that a Bigfoot-type creature exists that they really do exist, and she refused to take the chance. At that point I cast a hell of a big doubt on her devotion and beliefs, and she did nothing to refute me. She simply said that it wasn't up to her to convince anyone of anything, proving that she was either totally ignorant of my point or just choosing to ignore it. (Personally, I think her devotion sucks. If a liberal gave me the chance to prove to them that gun control doesn't work, I'd be all over that like hair on a - well, on a Bigfoot.)

The truth of the matter is that if "Rachael" and the six-hundred-odd folks at NESRP want to be taken seriously, if they want their petition to stand even a snowball's chance in Hell - which it doesn't now - they're going to have to convince nearly three hundred people, elected officials whose reputation and political careers will be affected by their decision, that this creature actually exists. And it's going to take a hell of a lot more than some shaky cell phone video filmed through the mesh screen of a tent, or some country bumpkin standing out in the woods in his RealTree camo outfit saying, "Yeah, I seen it, and it wuz raht over thar!" for that to happen.

Like I said, if you can't convince ME, then you stand ZERO chance with Congress.

And apparently I'm not the only one who feels this way; or, rather, there aren't that many people who feel the same way as "Rachael" does. You need to amass 25,000 signatures on any petition in order for the White House to even look at it, and you only have thirty days to do it. The "Tooth Fairy" petition, as I call it, runs out on February 10, a mere five days from now. So how many signatures do they have?

1,272 as of now. They still need 23,728 more signatures.

Good luck with that, "Rachael."

IHC